Thursday, May 05, 2005

Racin' for Rednecks

So in the south this week the story is all about racing. Horse and Nextell. I live in SC where Darlington is king. This week 150,000 people will invade a rural town with a racetrack. The town of Darlington will probably become the fourth largest in SC during the weekend, massive amounts of local and less local rednecks will motor their homes into the infield for a three day drunk. The legend has it there is a strict gun check at the gate. If you don't have any they give you one per cooler. Dirty women too.

Churchill Downs is the polar opposite of Darlington. Kentucky Derby Saturday is the social event of the south for the spring. It requires expensive suits, nice flowery dresses, and hats. Oh and bourbon. Now I've been to a horse race, twice well, maybe three times, I don't really know. It's like how many times have you seen Hootie and the Blowfish, eight, nine, fifteen I don't know. It's all the same just different day and sometimes a new place. Anyway, as I was saying I've been to a horse race before. You dress nice, you drink. I mean you really drink. You wake up back at home maybe you saw a horse maybe not, you've lost your shoes, you're sunburned, there is a hole in your pants and your Calvin Klein button down is now a sleeveless. Didn't I have a hat you wonder, you did and you lost it, with your wallet and senses. Stand up look in the mirror. You are now ready to go to Darlington.


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